Life and Death
by Fishawish
Summary: Merope's last night makes her think about a lot of things that happened in the past.


**Life and Death**

It's New Years Eve. The big city of London, so lively and crowded by daylight, is now as quiet as dead itself. The city looks like she is about to die, while all the people inside the houses and mansions are celebrating life. Everyone with a little common sense is safely inside; probably having big dinners with friends and family. The end of yet another year is something to celebrate after all.

There is no one to pay attention to the crumpled little woman who wanders the streets all by herself. She has no family, no friends. No, not anymore. If some passer-by would pay a little attention to his surroundings, he could see that the dirty and strange woman, who is wearing rags, is noting but a scared little girl. Her long, stringy hair covers part of her drained face and her grey eyes look empty. Tears are streaming down her face, her jaw is clenched in pain.

She tries to neglect all the pain and desperation she is feeling inside, but when she takes a look inside a large mansion and sees the head of the house serving a large turkey , she breaks again. They never had a turkey at their home. Neither had they hosted large dinners with friends or family. The only visitors were the policemen who came by the house when her father or brother had been caught stealing, dealing or fighting again. When they both ended up in Azkaban, she had felt so incredibly happy, so incredibly free. At last she was free to go and do what she wanted, instead of taking care of the house and dinner when her father and brother came home at night to celebrate their latest catch. Her carefully plotted plan had worked: her handsome neighbour – on whom she had been having a crush as long as she could remember – broke up with his fancy girlfriend and he had asked _her_ out on a date. Not long after that, she was able to move out of her elderly home and she had taken the opportunity with both her hands. Never before had she been so happy!

The rain starts to fall down faster and faster and she looks around desperately. Is there no place where she can take shelter for a while? For a short moment she finds a dry place, but it's not long before the owners of the house send her away. She suppress a shot of pain and tries to breathe deep and slow. Slowly, she stumbles towards the end of the street. The rain doesn't bother her anymore; she is drowning in her own thoughts, wondering where her life went wrong. Her father had been right all the time. She truly was a disgrace to the family for letting it come so far…

One day, after seven hours of struggling with a terrible headache and nausea, she left her work a little early. She was surprised to find him home already; he often came home shortly after seven, just in time for dinner.  
"Are you okay, sweetheart?" she had asked him. By doing so, she wasn't able to avoid the chandelier he trew at her. A pain beyond words had taken her and she had lost her consciousness. When she woke up after midnight, she was still lying on the kitchen floor. The house was quiet and he was nowhere to be found.

She is startled when the sound of heavy footsteps comes near. Panic takes hold of her and she throws her arms protectively around her stomach. She wonders was she is going to do when the footsteps belong to some tramps who are looking for trouble. They must be bound to make her hurt and take hold of all her beloved possessions. Her hand grasps the diamond ring she is wearing on a necklace. It is the only memory she has of him and she is not ready to say goodbye to it. Not yet.  
"Are you okay?" asks a voice behind her. She tries to answer the man, but all ability to speak is lost on her. It's not necessary to answer the man; no one in the right mind would believe for more than a second that she is doing even remotely okay. Suddenly another shock of pain shoots through her stomach and a soft "oh" escapes from her mouth. A large hand strokes her back carefully.  
"I will take you to the orphanage, that should be a three minute walk from here."  
For a very long second, she thinks about refusing his offer, but she knows she has to take care of herself. She nods again and tries to smile at the man, but instead tears are forming in her eyes. While they walk towards the orphanage, she thinks about all the horrible things he screamed at her before he left her. The past few hours she almost believed all of his curses would come true.

"Get madame Cole. Now!"  
A girl in a dark blue uniform races towards the stairs, throwing one last look to the man with the unconscious woman in his arm. The girl enters the office of her boss, who is entertaining herself with a glass of brandy and an old magazine.  
"You have to come quickly! An unconscious woman was just brought in. And madame… I believe she is pregnant."  
"I want you to make a bed as quickly as possible. Be sure to grab some towels and a bowl of hot water," Madame Cole orders before jumping up from her chair and sprinting to the ground floor. She bows over the young, unconscious woman. The woman has lank, brown hair, her little eyes are red and swollen and her chapped lips are bleeding. Cole wraps her hands around the forehead of the young woman and as a reaction, she blinks heavily against the sudden light and she starts to cough.  
"Tom? Is that you?"  
"Make sure you are ready! We are coming to you!" Madame Cole shouts towards the girl. Together with the man who brought her here they carry the young woman to a warm, comfortable bed. She must feel better then.

"Don't worry, miss. Everything will be all right."  
"Tom?" she asked, with a hint of hope in her voice.  
"Relax. I'm madame Cole and I am the owner the orphanage. Is Tom your husband? Do we need to warn him?"  
Almost unnoticeable she shakes her head. After everything Tom did to her, she couldn't handle him being around her. She couldn't handle anything anymore!  
"No. He left me," she mutters. The girl in the uniform gives her boss a shocked look.  
"What do you mean, my dear child?"  
"Gone. For ever. Without me…"  
Madame Cole shakes her head in desperation. There must be more going on then a break-up to cause this poor girl to be in the state she is in. Her eyes are averting and Madame Cole tries to reassure the girl.  
"It doesn't matter now. We are going to save you and your child tonight."  
She nods slowly and cleches her jaw to shut out the horrible pain she was feeling. The pain makes her remember all the horrible things she ever had to go through in her life. Her father and brother and the way they always made fun of her. Tom and the horrible way he had left her behind. All the little things she suppressed came floating back to her again. It was almost like she had to be in the most terrible pain she ever experienced.

The hours that follow are excruciating and almost unbearable to her. She feels clearly that she can lose this battle every second.  
"Come on, girl. You can do it. This is the last time!" soothes Madame Cole.  
She assembles all her last powers and pushes.  
"You did it, my child. It's a boy. A beautiful, little boy."  
She sighs and caresses the wet black hairs of the little boy. Her son.  
"Tom."  
"What did you say, dear?" asks Madame Cole, who looks concerned and a little proud, too. She orders her servant to get more towels and bows slowly over the bed.  
"Name him Tom Marvolo Riddle… Please."  
In shock Madame Cole stares to the mother and her newborn son.  
"No, dear. You have to stay with us. Do it for your son. You have to stay with us and watch him become a handsome man."  
"Please. Take good care of hime," she says, almost incomprehensible.  
"Stay with us, dear! Don't give in!"

Merope shows a weak smile to her son, who starts to cry softly, and then she closes her eyes. Madame Cole just stands there for a little while, staring at the little boy and his mother. She feels breathless, shaken. Life and death, so close to each other.


End file.
